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Category: Police Wife Life

She is a Girl: Why your Husband’s Female Partner is your Ally, Not Your Enemy

It’s late.

He should have been home by now.

He said he was going out with the shift for a beer or two, but that doesn’t take three hours.

You check your phone.  Again, nothing.

You check Facebook to see if maybe there was a call that made them leave work late. Nope, still nothing.

You check other social media, you check your phone one more time, and you even spend a minute or two listening to that scanner app you downloaded a few months ago to no avail.

The fear that your husband is in imminent danger suddenly gives way to doubt when you remember the whole shift means the whole shift, including his new female partner.  Suddenly, the concern you had for your husband has turned into pure jealousy.

Now you think, he’d better have a darn good explanation for being late.

5 Things Being A Police Wife Taught Me About Life

Something about the last few days has made me contemplate where I used to be versus where I am now.

Maybe it’s because my son is about to turn two (where did the time go?), maybe it’s because I realized I’m now closer to 30 than I am to 20 (seriously, where the heck did it go?), or maybe it’s just because, well, I’ve grown a lot over the last year alone, let alone the last 5 and 10 years.

It’s amazing to look back at who I used to be and think of all the differences.  Just under 10 years ago, I moved out on my own for the first time.  I learned how to live alone, I learned how to manage my money, I worked all kinds of jobs and lived in my super small studio apartment that I was insanely proud of.

My husband was just my boyfriend at the time, and had barely started applying to police departments.

We had no idea what life had in store for us.  Looking back, I feel like we were just kids.

Dear Police Recruit (A Letter to my Husband on his First Day)

Dear Police Recruit,

You looked so handsome this morning as I sent you out the door.

You tossed restlessly last night, and I laid next to you just thinking about all the new changes coming our way.

You woke up and showered and tied your tie in the bathroom mirror. We both smiled and exchanged those nervous glances. This is it!

You squared your shoulders and grabbed your lunch and then I kissed you goodbye.

It’s your first day at the police academy, and I am so, so proud of you.

5 Must-Read Books for Police Wives (Plus An Update!)

This post contains affiliate links. Read full disclosure here.

Since I’ve been feverishly working on writing my book (possibly a good choice of words, since I’m writing this with a stuffy nose and a fever right now ;)), I’ve been thinking about books for police wives… and man, there are some fantastic ones out there!

I wanted to showcase them all in a post for a few reasons:

  1. Seriously, they look incredible, and they deserve to be showcased.
  2. I hope one day my book will make it onto one of these lists – I guess I can start with adding it to my own when the time comes 🙂

Which reminds me: You all deserve an update!

7 Thoughtful Gift Ideas for Police Wives

This post contains affiliate links.  Read full disclosure here.

In my last post, I mentioned how hard men are to shop for.  Which is totally true…  But I also realize the flipside of that is that they tend to have a hard time shopping for women.

I mean, maybe not all – but I know my husband gets a little stuck on gift ideas for me.  And I figure if I’ve given you ladies a guide to help you shop, it’s only fair your husband gets a little assistance, too!

So even though I normally target my posts to you women – this time I’m talking to your husbands.  So go ahead and forward this to him if you think he might get stuck this year 😉

3 Ways To Have a Merry Christmas Without Your Husband

When you’re married to a first responder, you pretty much get used to doing things alone.  Trips with the kids, eating dinner, going to family events, etc.

But when Christmas comes around and your spouse has to work, that’s when his demanding schedule can get especially frustrating.  Whether that’s because he’s putting out house fires, pulling over drunk drivers, or because he’s battling overseas for his country, the holidays just aren’t meant to be spent alone.

But even if the holidays aren’t exactly what gets portrayed as the “perfect” family gathering, there are still plenty of ways to feel the joy of the holidays.

Benefits of Working On The Weekends

I’m not going to lie: one thing that can be hard as a police wife is that “normal” weekends are a thing of the past.

This is also true if you work retail, which has definitely been true for both of us before.  If you want to do anything on a Saturday or Sunday, it takes some strategic planning… but for the most part, if your husband works the weekends, it’ll just be you and the kids on your own.

I worked all through college, so most of my work hours were on the weekend, and at the time, it sucked.  I had a hard time seeing friends get to do fun things on Saturdays while I was stuck inside bagging groceries.  Even after graduation, I couldn’t get full weekends off by nature of working in a retail environment.

But that experience has paid off because by now, it’s normal to me.

Dealing with Fear as a Police Wife

I received a message from a reader the other day after posting this article from Melissa Littles on Facebook: The Police Wife Life: Selfish is Not An Option.  It’s one I read shortly before J went to the academy and I felt it was a great preparatory article.

This reader, however, said she didn’t like it.  She said it was depressing and scary.  In fact, she said, after reading it, she didn’t want her husband to become a police officer at all.

Yikes.  I wasn’t sure what to say.

In my experience, when someone feels called to law enforcement, not much will dissuade them.

Things To Do When Your Husband Works Nights

This post contains affiliate links.  For full disclosure, go here.

I have a love/hate relationship with night shifts.  On one hand, it’s hard to do dinner, bathtime, and bedtime routines all by myself and it can get lonely.  On the other hand, I definitely enjoy my alone time… and there’s something to be said for having the bed all to yourself.

One reason I have to enjoy night shifts is that I have a lot of hobbies to take up that time.  I enjoy Netflix as much as the next person, but at some point, I run out of shows I’m interested in.

If you’re struggling to make the most of night shifts right now, here are some ideas for hobbies to get you started!

How to Deal When a Female Partner Makes You Jealous

When my husband went to the police academy, we lived in an area about three hours away.  That meant he would leave Sunday night to drive there and stay until Thursday night, when he’d drive back.  The trip would be in a department car, and he’d be driving with the other three new recruits every week.  One of those three recruits was a woman.  I didn’t have any issue with that.  I thought, “how cool of her to join the department! I bet she’s awesome.”

When I dropped him off at the academy, however, there stood a tall, thin Blair Waldorf look-a-like with perfect hair and makeup asking my husband if he’d like to join them for dinner.  Meanwhile, I stood there, four months pregnant in clothes that fit awkwardly because I still looked like I’d just had a big lunch.  I wasn’t feeling exactly confident.